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Rat Race, Kid Division – 6 Worst Grown-Up Hypocrisies
By Christine Durst & Michael Haaren
Jan. 19, 2012
As we sidle into another dubious year, maybe it’s a good time to
ask ourselves about the roles we’re playing for our kids. The
actual roles, that is; not the roles we wished we played.
Everybody knows that actions speak louder than words. This is acutely
true for children, of course, whose eyes and ears are inconveniently
alive to the faintest traces of adult hypocrisy. How many times has a
parent, confidently explaining the merits of their latest admonition,
been nimbly ambushed by the lucid kid, wearing an innocent look?
Since it’s time for New Year’s resolutions, and grown-up
hypocrisies form a big part of the kid division of the rat race,
we’ll list the six that most often show up in polls of children
aged 1 to 18.
1. “Don’t be a bully!”
Kids hear this from school systems that bully their parents, school
systems that bully teachers, teachers who bully kids, parents who bully
kids, and governments who bully everybody. Obviously,
there’s much room for improvement here.
2. “Don’t litter!”
Kids hear this from parents as they’re driving cars that spray
nature with greasy smog, and roll by or over carcasses of deer,
raccoons, squirrels, possums, birds, and too many other creatures to
mention. They read it on signs on the side of roads next to big piles
of bulldozed trees. It’s even on the road that they cut through
the trunk of a giant sequoia. We’ll probably need to rethink some
of these trends.
3. “Be quiet!”
Kids hear this from grown-ups who talk loudly into their cell phones in
the car, in the store, in the movies, in the kitchen, in the bathroom,
in the outhouse, on the chamber pot, and from the graveside of a dear
departed relative who has gone on to that spotty network in the sky. At
some point, we’ll need to look at the message we’re
actually sending, but probably not today.
4. “Don’t have sex before you’re married!”
Children of many ages hear this from grown-ups who are having sex and
aren’t married, who aren’t married but wish they were
having sex, who are married and wish they were having sex, and who are
married and wish they weren’t having sex.
They also hear it from grown-ups whose Internet browser histories lead
one to conclude that sex in a jaw-dropping array of styles is very much
on their minds, with wedding bands conspicuously absent from the
exhibits. Much to ponder here.
5. “Don’t use bad words!” Alas, this freeway to perdition is gridlocked and filled with the hoarse but unbridled oaths of well-earned road rage.
6. “Do as I say, not as I do!” This one never works, of course, but at least we’re getting somewhere.
Christine Durst and Michael Haaren are leaders in the work-at-home
movement and advocates of de-rat-raced living. Their latest book
is Work at Home Now,
a guide to finding home-based jobs. They offer additional guidance on
finding home-based work at www.RatRaceRebellion.com. To read features
by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators
Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
COPYRIGHT 2012 BY STAFFCENTRIX, DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM